Rupert Pupkin
Jerry Langford
Masha
Rita Keane
Cathy Long
Bert Thomas
Jonno
Himself
Band Leader
Receptionist
Raymond Wirtz
Rupert's Mom (voice)
Dolores
Stage Door Fan
Stage Door Guard
Chauffeur
Young Girl
Man in Chinese Restaurant
Autograph Seeker
Caricaturist
Roberta Posner
Man at Telephone
Mr. Gangemi
Langford's Lawyer
Street Scum
Cabbie
Woman in Telephone Booth
Herself
McCabe
Mystery Guest
Security Guard
Cook
Audrey
Wilson Crockett
Gerrity
Giardello
Captain Burke
Langford's Agent
Crockett's Secretary
Ticket Taker
McCabe's Wife
Plainclothesman
Stage Manager
TV Director
First Man at Bar
Second Man at Bar
Newsman (voice)
Announcer (voice)
Liza Minnelli